Sunday, April 19, 2009

Feelings... friend or foe?

So, there I was having a perfectly decent day. It seemed like I had started to put things in perspective and was beginning to realize I was better off without the bum. I watched a little TV, folded some laundry, had din-din with the fam and then got ready for bed.

After sleeping for a couple of hours, I rolled over and in my dream-like state reached out for The Biologist (we were always sleeping practically on top of each other)... and all of a sudden I realized I was in the bed, alone. Alone, alone, alone. Oh god, all alone.

Goddamn feelings... I thought I had this one licked already. Sleep in the middle of the bed - check. Snuggle with my fuzzy bear - check. Tip back a few to dull the memories - check, check, and check. So what was the BFD? Why had my feelings ambushed me like this? I'm a relatively decent person... what did I do to deserve this? After all, I had sat down and explained to them that we needed to be there for one another. So, why now were they choosing to bring me to my pathetic knees?

Good thing my friends and family seem to think these types of random outbursts are normal. Otherwise I would be in deep shit. I've scolded my feelings and explained to them that this is unacceptable behavior. They've promised to be better in the future. Am I being the hopeful optimist, once again? Only time will tell.

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