When good cereal goes bad...

Is anyone else as disturbed by this commercial as I am?

It makes me wonder who looks at those story boards and then approves a commercial like this? Disturbing...

Personally, I don't think cannibalism and breakfast cereal really go together. But that's just me...

Two weeks...

This can be considered a short time. Or it can feel like a lifetime. I guess it depends in what circumstance you're in as to how long (or short) 2 weeks really is.

On vacation? Too short...

Waiting to sort things out with your significant other? Way too long...

But that's what he asked for and that's what he's going to get. Am I happy about it? Not. Even. A. Little. But it's what he felt he needed and therefore it's the only thing I can do. If the situation were reversed, I would want him to respect what I felt I needed and not harass me about it...

But still... 2 weeks? Really?

*sigh*

It's not that I mind being independent or out of touch (for a little while). What I fear is that we'll both have way too much time to think. I think that is just as dangerous as not putting much thought in at all. And with no communication for the next while, I have nothing better to do than dissect what happened over and over again. There is no way to get confirmation or clarification while that is happening... which I think can be dangerous.

Not a good situation. And I'm not really seeing a good solution...

Reflections...

As I am faced with the possible end of my current relationship (I hope not, but it's a 2 person thing and right now there is very little communication from the other side) I find myself looking back at not just this relationship but the ones that have come before.

Farmer remains my favorite ex. We fought long and hard to make sure that our friendship succeeded where we, as a couple, had failed and I love him for making the effort. It wasn't easy. At. All. And he could have told me to fuck off many times and never did. He's always been willing to pick up the phone and listen to me bitch and then show me a side of the problem that would have never occurred to me. He is one of my dearest friends... still.

The Biologist is a difficult relationship to sort out. I'm pissed he cheated (and that I didn't listen to my instincts) and that he wasn't straight up with me about it until much, much later. At the time, though, he was what I needed to get out of a bad marriage. So I'm glad about that. He also gave me confidence again. He's now engaged and doing well. I wish him the best...

Ex-hub is by far the most frustrating and difficult relationship to work out in my head. On paper, it was a great marriage. We had many good things going for us. Unfortunately, paper didn't match real life. As my sis once wisely said... you either grow together or grow apart. And we grew apart. Ex-hub felt that the wedding day was the finish line. After that, he figured he didn't need to put in any time or effort. And those of you who have long-term relationships know this not to be the case. It is work. It's like a garden. If you don't tend to what is planted and keep it growing, it withers and dies. And that is exactly what happened with us. With very long-lasting effects. There are feelings I still have about that whole situation that are unresolved.

And perhaps this is part of the problem with my current relationship. Old baggage resurfacing until I figure out a way to put it to rest, once and for all. Or maybe baggage never entirely goes away. It does become a part of who you are, after all...

As you can tell, my brain is all over the place. Jumping around hither and yon...

I guess I'm just tired. It's been 2 nights of very little sleep and I've never been so glad to see a Friday. Hopefully this weekend I can get a few things sorted out. We'll see...

Should vs. Actually...

How my night should have gone:

Get off work. Pick up RR and drive over to Mags. Take a wonderful horseback ride. Snuggle and cuddle with RR. Sleep.

How my night actually went:

Get off work, kinda. Go to town for cocktails with the co-workers and chit-chat about work and other stuff. Come home to an empty house (RR and pups out walking). Get that uncomfortable feeling upon RR coming back that something isn't quite right (but ignore it). Read. Try talking to RR but end up bickering instead. Have bickering evolve into a full-blown meltdown (and then realize too late that sugar has definitely been introduced into RR's diet). Cry. A lot. Get maybe an hour of sleep.

Part not on the best of terms...

I have no idea what will happen now. Our relationship is in serious crisis. Can it survive? I'm not sure what the answer is to that just yet. What I would like is for RR to pull through to the other side of this so we can actually have a discussion about it. From what I'm hearing (and seeing) it's probably going to be a few days before that happens. And patience never was my strong suit...

I'm mad, sad, tired, frustrated and very scared. It's going to be a rough day. For both of us...

Nothing better...

There are few things better in life than a great bf and a fabulous bff. Over the holiday weekend, I had both...

RR was already in town (and his car is, thankfully, working again) and Bff and her offspring wandered in on Saturday afternoon.

Before they got there, RR and I attempted a ride. I say attempted because we were only out about a 1/2 hour. I was riding the LL's (landlord) new horse, which was supposedly a very broke, kid-type horse. Um, no. He's not... And Flash, unfortunately wasn't helping matters. He was feeding off of Scoot's energy and getting all frisky too. So, RR was having no fun and neither was I. I had my hands full... and that's saying something. And then the bridle broke. I decided to dismount and just walk back. Seemed safer that way.

I'm bummed for LL because she thought they had a winner. And he's great from the ground... a perfect gentleman. Unfortunately, someone forgot to continue his education under saddle. She's trying to get back into horses after a long layoff and wanted something she could just hop on and ride. Scoot, unfortunately, is not it...

Anyway, on Sunday RR, Bff, her offspring and I decided to hit the river for a day of floating. It was a blast. But before we hit the river, we made a stop at Walmart first...

And found RR some new accessories...

Then it was off to the river. Bff and offspring decided to do the tubes...

Boy that water looks cold...

While RR and I stuck to the boat...

This is the life...

A duck came by to see if we had any nomzy stuff to offer her...

You have nothing? You people are worthless...

And after the first few times down the river, it started to get a little crowded...

It was like a traffic jam. Only with lots more drunk driving... or floating... or whatever.

RR had to use his special skills (and paddles) to navigate through traffic...

Yes, Birkenstocks count as paddles...

We thought there was food being freely offered on the river...

Turns out they're just cattails and not edible (really) at all...

We weren't the only ones finding interesting ways to paddle around town (and the river). Check out this party bicycle built for 14...

It even comes with a bartender to serve you libations as you peddle.

Now that's my kind of bike...

It was a good weekend. RR is still in town so we're going to load up the horses and head over to Mags to ride tonight. Should be a way better ride than we had on Saturday. At least, it'd better be. Or I'll kick Storm and Flash both...

Just add a little grass...

Well, a lot of grass, actually...

He's starting to look like a horse...

Rather than a sad sack of bones...

And it's only been a week and a half. I haven't even started him on grain yet and already he's put on visible weight. Which, of course, just tells me that there is nothing wrong with him except his ex-owner. All he needs is food... 

I also got a good pic of the fire that is still raging to the North and causing all sorts of problems.

A beautiful sunset but makes it hard to breathe...

Well, RR arrived in town last night. Unfortunately, his car did not arrive with him. It gave up the ghost with about 30 miles to go. He's out taking a look at it today and I'm hoping it will be an easy fix. Otherwise we might just be looking for a new vehicle for him. Soon...

I hope that extra 15 seconds you saved was worth it...

For the most part, I'm lucky. I live in a pretty rural area north of Bend and work in a very rural area east of Bend. I get to skirt around most of the traffic and usually have a very uneventful drive to work...

Until I run into some asshat on the road trying to pass a long line of cars... coming from the other direction.

This happened to me this morning. Although typically I can see them coming and can slow down. This time, I popped over a small rise and there was a car trying to pass in my lane. I jerked my car onto the gravel shoulder (nearly losing control of my car) and barely missed getting hit head-on by the absolute asshat in my lane.

Needless to say, I just sat there a while regaining my composure. It was a very close call. I could have reached out and touched the hood of the car as it went by me.

I just don't understand why people do this. Maybe he (and it was a he) saved a few minutes of drive time, but at what cost? We could have both died... If I hadn't seen him in time, we probably would both be bloody smears on the road. I'm not sure which car would've won out. He was driving a mid-size Honda and I'm in the VW. I'm kinda thinking that all the airbags in the Bug would have given me a chance, but who knows?

Life is precious, people. Remember that. And I will try to, too...