Thursday, April 1, 2010

Hay, I curse thee...

Let's see... Flash is now 12, so I have been a horse owner since 1999. August 15, 1999 to be exact. And the whole time I have been said owner of said horse, the cursed beast has had to eat. Funny how that works. But in order for them to be happy equine, they must have full bellies. For lots of stories about asshats that do not feed their horses and get rudely outed in a very public forum, swing on over to Fugly Horse of the Day. It's an eye-opener. Anyway, I personally do not want to end up featured there so I continue to feed my beasts. Some days, though... (shakes her fist in the general easterly direction of Elmo)

Who me?

The original plan was to buy from a guy fairly local that had good hay in big 1/2 ton bales. I was going to buy 2 and put them out in the pasture, 1 at a time, for Flash and Bella to feed off as they desire. For most horses this is not a good plan, because they get super fat and can founder. However, Flash and Bella are both high-strung arabs and can be tough to keep weight on (although Farmer assures me he can have Flash on the verge of founder in no time... I'll keep that in mind).

I was supposed to pick up these 2 bales last week. Every time I called he was either busy or not picking up the phone. In the meantime, the hay I had brought with me when I moved Flash was dwindling rapidly... darn horses and their daily desire to eat!!

Friday rolled around and the guy called me and told me he was out. Ah, crap. The mad scramble began to find another source. I finally found a place about 35 miles NE that had good hay for sale at a very reasonable price ($90/ton) and made an appointment to go out and pick it up yesterday. I was going to leave work a little early so I could be unloading in the light rather than the dark. 

Well, yesterday I get a phone call at about noon. It is the farm lady telling me that her loaders are not available today and can I come back Saturday. Um, no... I can't. The last of the hay was fed the previous night. I need it now. Ok, she says... guess you'll just have to load it yourself. Right after that BO (Bella's owner) calls and says he can't help unload unless I'm there at 4pm. Ah, crap. 

So I decide to leave a little earlier than planned. I jump in the truck, get to the farm and begin to load the hay. The little old lady did knock part 0f the stack over with her extremely rusty tractor, at least. I wasn't looking forward to scaling the stack... it was looking pretty unstable. 

So I begin to load. At first the bales don't feel that heavy. By the end, it's all I can do to get them in the trailer. At that point I am sweating so badly that the hay is sticking to me... which, of course, is making me itch. I hop in my truck and proceed to pull out. Ah, crap. I'm stuck. I get back out and lock my hubs so I can use my 4-wheel drive. Success!! I am free... and headed back to the coast. 

As I'm heading back over the coast range it begins to snow. Seriously? It's like a day away from April and it's snowing? Ah, crap. Luckily, it wasn't sticking anywhere but at the very tippy-tops of the mountains. 

So I make it back to the pasture and BO is there. Hooray!! Only he then informs me that he has moved some equipment so I can get into the shed through the back way and that he's now leaving to go meet with his accountant. Ah, crap. So, I unload and stack... alone... 

As I'm unloading, the rain stops, the wind stops and the sun comes out. And I start sweating even more... which, of course, means that more hay is sticking to me. Man it is a lot of work loading and unloading this crap. But I get it done... Hooray!!

Then I get home and it is still bright and sunshiny and the dogs are going crazy. They haven't been out for a walk in a few days because I've been under the weather. So, I figure what the hell... and off we go for a walk. 

Thanks mom. See what a good dog I am?

This morning the only body part moving without much pain is my fingertips. The rest of me is not speaking to me... Not that I blame it... it was a lot of work (stop sniggering Farmer... I know for you it's like nothing). 

The good news is I don't have to do that again for a few months... Ah, crap. You mean there will be a next time?

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