Last night I get a call from Farmer (actually it ended up being like 5 or 6 calls) about his current situation... which involved him driving to somewhere in Washington and hauling a horse through the ghetto of Pasco and delivering it to... well, somewhere else. Oh yeah, and he hadn't actually met this girl before... she was a contact from the internet dating site.
(Yes, he does have "SUCKER" tattooed on his forehead if you were wondering)
So, of course, I must know the story... but he didn't have the whole story. Yet. That comes later. All he knew was that she needed to move her horse out of Location A and deposit it to Location B (and why she would pick a stranger she's never met before to do this defies explanation... but anywho). Oh, and she mentioned there wouldn't be any drama. OK. Good to know.
Except her definition of drama seems to vary from, well... the rest of the world's.
So, here is the text conversation after Farmer asked for the whole story (after horse was already moved and he was headed home)...
Crazy: Just 2 clarify...i dated him years ago..so there is no drama
He just wanted the horse gone
Farmer: So whats the whole story? Why'd you need to move the horse?
Crazy: She had only been there one month
Prior 2 that she was at my friend bryans house
I only moved her 2 petes house cause there was more ppl in burbank 2 ride with and for some reason he got it in his head that i was moving her out there so i could work stuff out with him
However...i never said that he just assumed
which is his fault
so instead of telling me that he was butt hurt over it he began telling me i was neglecting my horse..which i don't....i was just neglecting giving him the attention he wanted......so he told me i had 1 week 2 move her after i 've dumped thousands into his land
which is his fault for assuming and not communicating
had he said that was a stipulation or expectation then i'd have never moved her
he chased me for 3 years in RN school and i always told him we were just friends...he couldn't handle that... Last year he proposed and we had never even dated...that lasted only 3 months and he broke it off cause i worked lots of hours and he said i chose my career over him
(wait... you never dated but you said yes to a proposal? methinks that is not quite the way things went down)
I said "whatever" and tried 2 b friends and he can't handle friends so i just have 2 walk away so he can heal
so r we good or r u weirded out?
(I know I'm weirded out)
what i ment by "no drama" was that there is no yelling or fighting or white trash shit gonna go on(thanks for clarifying your definition of drama)
farmer: no, i'm not weirded out, just had a feeling there was more to the story
(I'm hoping he said this because he doesn't want her showing up on his doorstep with a shotgun)
crazy: and i told u only b/c i had nothing 2 hide
Had i not said ne thing u'd have never known. but that's not me...i'm honest 2 a fault
ok well sorry.....this was not the way i wanted 2 meet u
(now I'm curious as to how her normal meet-and-greets go... and why she had not one other single person on the face of this earth that she could call to help her move a horse... makes ya wonder. I mean, I know Farmer isn't an ax murderer... but she didn't know that)
farmer: no worries...shit happens thats all
(again, I'm kinda hoping he's just saying this for self-preservation's sake...)
Once he was home and we were discussing his crazy evening with Crazy, I have decided to upgrade myself from crazy to pretty-damn-normal...
The party for this momentous event will be at 3...