Friday, June 26, 2009

Small gestures, big impact...

I'm not sure what got me on this train of thought this morning... probably because it was a lazy morning in bed and I tend to get reflective during quiet times like that. Or, I'm seriously disturbed. Either way, it's a win...

So, I was thinking about small gestures (good and bad) and how they can have such a huge impact on a person. I've picked out a few examples of good and bad and the type of impact they can have on a person. The point is, the little things matter... good and bad.

OK, first up: Using someone's name rather than a pet name or no name at all. Think about it... when you hear a compliment wouldn't you love to hear your name attached to it? OK, this could just be a me thing. Or maybe just a girl thing. I would much rather hear my name than hear a pet name time and again. It just attaches so much more meaning to it when it's not just a generic sentiment.

Holding hands. Cliché I know, but it is so true. There is something so intimate about holding hands. It's often overlooked and underused, which is sad in my opinion. And sometimes it can be a more intimate affection than sex. One of my favorite memories... riding side by side and holding hands. It was an incredible moment that will forever be etched in my memory. Also, stroking someone's hair is kinda in the same vein. Either as affection or as comfort. Either way, the point gets across loud and clear.

Letting someone do something for you. This one, come to find out, is a hard one for me. It seems that this has been absent from my life for so long that I'm not quite sure how to react when someone extends the helping hand... go figure. But, I know how I feel when someone who needs help lets me provide it. Both of us get the huge benefit. And that's how it should be. Freely given and freely received... the 2nd part is a WIP (work in progress).

Notes. Be it a sticky note, a text or whatever. Taking the time to let someone know you're thinking about them can be a huge boost in an otherwise dreary day.

Kissing. And I'm not talking about the chicken peck that so many guys seem to be a fan of. I'm talking about really kissing someone. Taking their breath away kissing. Passionate, steamy kissing. You know, the kind that makes your knees go weak. Another very underutilized gesture.

OK... now there are the bad things too. Here are a few that absolutely drive me up a wall...

Shutting down when conflict arises. A small gesture that will blow up quicker than any other I know. There is nothing worse when in the middle of conflict than having someone completely shut down and ignore you and the resolution that needs to be reached. It makes you feel completely worthless and helpless... two feelings that really I like to avoid.

Not being dependable. Saying you'll do something and then not doing it sucks. Maybe to you it wasn't a big deal, but to the other person it was. Don't say you'll do it if you're not going to.... end of story. Period.

So, what small things mean the most to you? Think about it, then try to make a habit out of including these things in your life more often.

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