The "L" word...

No... not love. Lust. This is the "L" word no one wants to talk about. That slyly hidden emotion that hides in the guise of love... or at least hides in the pants of it anyway. You know, it's like the crazy uncle no one wants to acknowledge. But you can't help and invite him to parties due to the entertainment factor that is likely to ensue when said uncle has had "one to many". That, my friends, is not love... it's lust in disguise.

So, heed me now when I say you need to know the difference. And being the kind of person that I am (generous to a fault, I'm sure) I'm going to impart this knowledge to you. And I'll do it in a way that all of my dedicated readers can follow. So here we go...

If you exhibit extreme jealousy whenever your SO (significant other) leaves the house
it's LUST
If you trust your SO and don't worry about it (without having blinders on, of course)
it's LOVE

If you have nothing else to talk about EXCEPT sex
it's LUST
If you do many things together and have lots to talk about INCLUDING sex
it's LOVE
(and if you do many things together but NEVER talk about sex
it's OVER or you're just FRIENDS)

If you want the best for yourself and don't worry about your SO
it's LUST
If you want nothing but the best and are supportive of your SO
it's LOVE

If you take care of yourself
it's LUST
If you take care of SO and yourself
it's LOVE

Are you getting the gist yet? Also, one other thing that I should note... if your SO is selfish to begin with, this is NEVER going to change. Oh, you might get some good behavior for a week or two... possibly even a month (depending on how much you threatened). But selfish people are selfish for a reason. They don't want to think about anyone other than themselves... and because you are NOT them, you will never be first in their eyes. Trust me on this one, folks!! I've had the opportunity to see this one up close and personal, and it never gets any better.

OK, that is my public service announcement for the day. Any questions?